White House Completes Installation of Tanning Beds inside Oval Office

President Trump

Washington D.C. – Contractors confirmed Thursday afternoon that they completed work for artificial tanning facilities in the White House.

Marked as a top priority since inauguration due to the President’s fading color. Orangeifyers Inc, a NY area tanning bed contracting firm were brought in to assure the president can maintain his orange tone.

“This was really more than your average job. From installation of child proofing technologies to keep Steve Bannon out of the beds, from shields to assure Pence’s vampire like skin is not harmed when in proximity for Trumps meetings. This was far more than your average job. Thankfully, we are experience and tax payers can rest assured that their money is being spent on quality services.” said Arnold Garcia of Orangeifyers Inc.

Release documents indicate this is not the only move this Presidency is going to make to enhance our nation’s top leaders color. But Air Force one is due to be fitted with beds as well later this month.

When contacted for more information the White House declined comment.

 

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